Call Him Monster

He resides in the crawlspaces of my mind, capitalizing on the misfiring neurons shattered by trauma and faulty wiring. If we are a genetic mistake, then my dear brother; you are a genetic wasteland where evolution goes to die. Made up of generational miscodings and slivers of evolutionary patchwork, an abomination that offends even the lowest of creatures remains.

How hard we have tried to bring you into the light, to drown you in sunlight, to let the burn wash you clean of the past. How we have struggled to fill the pit you call lover with joyous momentum and an ill-kept promise of renewal. We have taken your beatings, your lashings, and your wicked tongue without a moment’s hesitation. Saving you from yourself has exhausted our resourcefulness, and I have no more room for the damage you wish to cause. The rituals of scarification have completed what you tasked them with, my skin telling our pathetic story of origin. My flesh no longer has room for your pain, yet another failure of mine that enrages you to no end.

We dance opposite each other while stoking the fire of agony, togetherness a thing of the past. To lock eyes would cause a chasm this world could not bear, our humanity trapped in that thing you call a heart. Does it still beat? Or have I played puppeteer with a corpse not even their god could resurrect? It took a god to create you, yet no god wields enough power to shackle you. Humanity would quiver if they knew what you were capable of, and there are no words to prepare them.

Demise will be slow for you and anyone foolish enough to stay for the end. Ancestral debt will be paid with bloodshed, violence, and heartache. The force of karma has forsaken our bloodline, and our refusal of acknowledgment digs the knife in deeper. Repayment was demanded from us both, yet I stand the only one with daggers in my spine. To love and to lose you is a punishment far worse than never knowing you at all. Admitting my failures, my craving for evolution, and my hopes for your future devastate me in a way that words cannot describe. So why, my little brother, do I finally feel free?

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